


How to Care for Your Squip

by emirain



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Crack, Gen, Joke Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-04
Updated: 2017-09-04
Packaged: 2018-12-23 23:19:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 178
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12000039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emirain/pseuds/emirain





	How to Care for Your Squip

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Pinktoria](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pinktoria/gifts), [Endernerd14](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Endernerd14/gifts).



**Part One: The basics**

•Do not hECK the Squip  
Don't  
Ew

•don't get food  
Squip don't need food  
Squip eats ur self esteem for breakfast

•don't buy a bed  
squip does not sleep because it's a computer.

•don't leave Squip unsupervised  
It will get into all sorts of trouble like trying to brainwash everyone and maybe take over the world. If you must, turn Squip into sleep mode so it does not take over the world

•buy a bed for Squip  
Squip needs a place to sleep

**Part Two: Behavior**

• if you notice your Squip is being overly sassy, condescending, and egotistical:  
\- argue with it  
\- sass it back (warning: may result in a full blown sass war)  
\- call it something like "Windows 97" or "floppy drive" or "Cortana", this will hurt its feelings to much for it to continue sassing

**Part Three: shock zap**

• don't let your Squip shock zap anyone  
bad for the people who get shock zapped  
Teaches bad manners to Squip

_Follow these steps and Squip will grow up strong and polite_

_Disclaimer: (it won't)_


End file.
